I know we are past Valentine's Day, and couples are probably putting romance back on the shelf for a while, but I wanted to make a PSA for some men who aren't sure if they have a lot in common with their girlfriend or not. Yes, you may THINK your girlfriend is doing everything she can to impress you, but sometimes, she just really is that way.
So, if you really want to know the difference - to see if she's being real, or if she will be canceling your Sunday Ticket subscription on DirecTV - read below.
She's probably not just trying to impress you if any of these are true…
1. She keeps cleats in her car.
She never knows when a softball team or flag football team will need her. It's better to just keep them in the car than to be caught without them. Or they're just to muddy to bring into the house.
2. She leaves through the back door at church to avoid talking to people so she can make it home in time for kick off.
God, of course, is #1. But she needs to see who #2 will be for the day. And sometimes those 1:00 kick-offs cut it pretty close.
3. Going to the batting cages is an acceptable Valentine's Day activity.
Going to the batting cages is acceptable on any day. What says "I love you" more than smashing things with a long metal stick?
4. She looks forward to a date at Home Depot (or Lowe's. She may or may not be very picky.)
And not just to look at paint swatches or appliances, although they are kind of fun too. If she hasn't even noticed you have moved on to another aisle, she's found her niche.
5. She's mad that none of her Christmas presents have her team's logo on them.
And you could incite a war if you give her something from a rival team. My husband keeps insisting that I would look sexy in this Steelers shirt or that one. But I just. Can't. Do it.
6. She cries because you've given her tickets to the game, but didn't cry when you proposed.
She knows you'll always be there for her. But she doesn't know when the Giants will be back in town to play the Phillies again. (Yes, that was a hint for my husband. The Giants are in Philly just a little after my birthday. Sorry to prostitute my blog for my own gain here.)
7. Sci-Fi movie or sappy romance? You don't even need to ask her.
Unless we are talking about Dr. Who, because that is an acquired taste. Otherwise, she can Yoda-talk with the best of them.
8. The waitress can't automatically assume she knows whose dinner is whose when your meal is ready.
Because maybe the steak is hers and the crab cakes are his. It just might happen that she is craving some protein after a long week of playing games.
9. You don't have to worry about remembering when your team plays, because she's got the schedule memorized.
She, of course, will know when her team plays. And probably, she will know when her team's rivals play. She may even know the whole conference schedule for the week. But if your team plays in a different conference, and she still knows when their bye is? That's love.
10. Beating you at ANYTHING is her top goal.
Because a woman like this is always striving for the best. So, if her goal is to top you, then you must be the best. Awww. Take it as a compliment.
So, if you have been spending a lot of time with a person like this, I hope you like it. Because chances are, she is not going to change. Trust me.
*Note- Although there seems to be an amazing resemblance, the girl in the above picture is NOT me. You may have been thrown off by her fixation on the TV with the football game, but I am rarely smiling when I watch my teams play. I am a Philly team fan.
I don't mean to be unoriginal here, as I have actually seen a similar post. But seeing as it cracked me up enough to want more, I decided to do one of my own.
Perhaps I'm just in a snarky mood, but really. Sometimes I wonder how people came up with some of these signs to mean what they intended. Like this one: <--
1. Intended Meaning- Stop for a school bus with flashing lights ahead.
But Could It Also Be?- If you are going to ram into a school bus, aim to jump your car up high, so you don't hit any people. And do it before the bus lifts into the sky.
You probably want to reconsider ramming a bus, however, as it appears they can do amazing things.
2. Intended Meaning- Cyclists may use bus lane
But Could It Also Be?- While riding your bike, beware of flying busses. (That will overtake you after the finish line.)
Let's have some fun.
3. Intended Meaning- Hiking trial
But Could It Also Be?- After putting on your jet pack, follow the straight line up.
More fun with people…
4. Intended Meaning- Couples welcome (Not sure if this is an actual ROAD sign.)
But Could It Also Be?- Conjoined twins separated here!
5. Intended Meaning- Pedestrian crossing
But Could It Also Be?- It's hard to get around when you have no feet, so be sure to stay between the lines.
Some road managers have strong feelings about letters…
6. Intended Meaning- No parking
But Could It Also Be?- We don't want no stinkin' letter "P"s here.
7. Intended Meaning- Road splitting
But Could It Also Be?- But we are okay with the letter "Y."
8. Intended Meaning- Speed bump ahead
But Could It Also Be?- Watch out for the quicksand that just swallowed the guy in the bowler hat.
Sometimes, you don't even need to think too hard to be creative.
9. Intended Meaning- Don't hit people while speeding with your car? (Do they really waste tax payers' money on such signs?)
But Could It Also Be?- Breakdancing on top of moving vehicles IS allowed here.
You've gotta love the easy ones.
10. Intended Meaning- There's a farm on top of this rocky hill.
But Could It Also Be?- Sign creator may have consumed too much alcohol.
But, I just can't stop…
Bonus: Intended Meaning- It's not advised to drive your car off the cliff.
But Could It Also Be?- Really. It's not advised to drive your car off the cliff.
Hope you had a good laugh. Feel free to share signs you've interpreted.
Because I love even numbers and lists!